The womanizer’s guide to Axiom is the result of a one on one texted based game between myself and Mark Bell. It takes place on the fantasy world of Axiom and follows a spoiled merchants son as he gets in over his head!
“Hold on!” The Imbube driver screamed as she hit a fork in the road, Breaking hard to the right.
The haphazard turn made two of the wheels leave the road as the wagon leaned up slightly. For a second Titus believed the cart ride was about to end tragically before it began. He grabbed the side of the cart and held on for dear life, it was all he could do not to drop his gun or be thrown out.
The thief however had no problem as her legs bent and shifted with the cart under her. She took aim and pulled the trigger, letting the hammer fall, striking the flint and igniting the gunpowder inside. Her pistol fired and sent a lead ball into the right rider’s shoulder. The battle hardened pursuer rocked in his saddle, but did not fall. He instead grit his teeth and spurred his horse on.
The wounded rider pulled a pistol with his good arm jamming the reins of his horse into his mouth. The second rider also pulled a pistol, both riders let their ammo fly. The projectiles struck the cart, one wized inches from Titus’ head.
The thief had already begun to reload her single shot pistol as the cart righted itself and the wheels crashed back to the dirt road. The Third and final pursuer had used the gunfire and the thief’s reloading to spur his horse on coming up to the side of the cart fast. The thief had not seen him as she was focused on getting her weapon ready again.
Titus grit his teeth and whirled his pistol hand back around just as that third rider expertly leapt from his horse onto the passenger side of the bench at the front, Stiletto style knife in his hand he was looking to take out the driver. The Imbube had no idea focused on trying to not wreck the wagon during the high speed chase. Titus jerked the trigger, forgetting all his training while under the absurdly high stress of the situation. The ball struck the Pirates right upper thigh and with a mist of blood he howled before falling. Managing to catch the bench he dangled there his feet scraping through the dirt.
The Imbube spurred the cart on, trying to gain as much speed as possible as they careened down the road, the island’s tropical jungle thick to either side. This was the very reason a large root had gone rogue and spider webbed out into the route of the cart, which hit it causing the cart to jump unexpectedly. This was the first thing that caught the thief off guard, she bobbled the gun just as she finished reloading and it clanked to the cart bed.
The wounded rider sped up, unable to reload on the horse because of his shoulder, He pulled his cutlass with his good hand and lept to the back of the cart just as the thief reached for her gun, his foot caught it as he landed and sent it spinning deeper into the cart.
He turned and kicked The thief to the face, her head snapping back against the wood of the cart wall. Titus scowled, slapping the barrel of his gun against his leg to clear it while scrambling into his pouch for a Ball and powder wad. He dropped the gunpowder wrapped in thin flash paper into the barrel then the lead ball as fast as he could.
At the same time the thief placed a kick to the gut of the pirate pushing him backwards, it was all he could do to catch the edge and not go over. She turned to crawl for her gun but another pistol shot splintered the wood above her and she had to drop flat to avoid fire from the one remaining rider on horseback..
Titus outstretched the pistol to shoot the brigande in front of him when a roar sounded from behind him. The pirate he had shot had pulled himself back up, knife in hand and lunged at the Imbube. The roar had allowed her to lean back avoiding the fatal blow, but the knife still slid along her chest opening it up, she dropped the reins as the Pirate reared back to stab again, Titus turned and fired, the shot connecting to the shoulder of the arm holding the knife. The Pirate screamed this time dropping the knife, The Imbube stood up into a powerful uppercut, The entirety of her force put into the blow caught the bandit under the chin sending him over the edge and toppling into the jungle foliage.
The driver turned now to try and recover the lead, only to see an ever larger tree root, like a small wall in front of them, “Hold On!”
The cry came only a half second before the wagon hit the branch vaulting it into the air for a full second and what felt like an eternity, Titus had to let go of his pistol to grab the Cart and keep himself from going over the side, . “Damn, my pistol! Now I’m really on edge.”
The pirate in the back however rode the bump with no problems watching the thief bounce roughly on the cart bed, his training at sea preparing him for this. He stepped forward and raised the cutlass to deal the death blow when she surprised him by pushing to her knees and spinning into him. A flick of the wrist and a click of the spring loaded mechanism that kept the 2 inch spike like blade concealed in her right sleeve popped out and into her hand. The fluid motion continued with deadly accuracy as she drove the blade expertly into his chest and into his heart.
She pulled the blade back and the pirate folded backwards out of the cart and into the dust.
The jump had sent the lead down under the horses, there was no longer a way to control the cart, The Imbube knew she had to stop it. The horses were whipped into a frenzy and any slamming of the breaks would end poorly with them attached. To make matters worse the road took a steep left curve up ahead. The Imbube reached down and pulled a pin from the rigging, freeing the horses from the cart, she then reached for the massive hand brake hoping there was still time to…
The remaining ridered fired with expert accuracy this time burying the sizable lead ball deep in the Imbube’s left back shoulder. A howl of agony and she rocked backwards, the pain blinding her. She tried to rally and tried to pull herself back up to hit the brake but saw it was now far too late as the side of the road and the deep jungle was on top of them.
“Brace!” She screamed futility.
The road was raised slightly with the jungle stretching down on an incline, it was moderate when going normal speed, the cart however at full blaze exploded over the edge like it was a cliff, soaring for a full too count, somehow missing the trees until crashing to the ground front first, The cart flipping forward and hurling the three remaining passenger’s deep into the jungle.
The cart flipped on more time then slammed into a tree shattering on impact. The last rider came to a halt pulling his horse up and calming him. The pirate sneered at the wreckage but only for a second, because he knew he would have to head into the jungle, find what was left of the three transgressors, kill them and retrieve the Amulet.
He knew better than to return to Captain Dufrees empty handed. The islands of the Affiliation were dangerous things off the roads, dense tropical foliage easy to get lost in, Monsters willing to eat you whole but these things paled in comparison to the danger of the captain scorned.
The Last Tea Shop. A solo TTRPG playthrough. Written by Ash Alder and narrated by Zachariah Van Sluyters
Chapter 6 drops next week!!!